I didn’t consider it at the time but while editing these photos I came to realize how this location, a broken down store in the heart of downtown Wichita Falls, is a kind of a symbol of my current self. For reasons I could probably explain over several lengthy blog posts that may eventually happen, the last few months I’ve been the destructor of my own world. What I can say for myself now is that I know what I’m doing; I’m rebuilding.
Maybe it’s because I know that in 5 months I’ll be graduating college with (hopefully) a plan as to where I’m moving to work at a news station. I know that my life is about to move me out of my comfort zone and change drastically and I feel the need to be in complete control of where I’m going, like always, but I know that for the most part I am definitely not in control of my fate. I know that what is meant for you in this life won’t pass you by, but I also know that if you don’t go after what you want you’ll never have it. So I guess this path of destruction of mine is more of a detoxifier to be able to find what I truly want for my future. To find what makes me happy and to be sure I never settle on it.
All my hard-work, passions, and dreams are coming to a fruition in May and I’ve reached a point where I’ve become more focused on the journey for myself rather than who’s not coming on it with me. I’ve learned to let a lot of things and people go that I essentially depended on once upon a time. I realized that there is a lot of decisions I’m about to be making and I need to be thinking clearly for me. Despite how rough the path was to get here, in a surprisingly short amount of time, I am a firm believer in a life detox when it comes to letting the idea of something go that may be hard to let go of, to make room for better things to come.
“This is not your practice life. This is all there is.”
Let it inspire you or terrify you, but let me be the one to personally tell you that it is never too late to start over and create that revolution in your heart, that the people and places meant to be in your life will be. I’ve yet to hear of destruction that didn’t hurt, however, you’ll never know the product of how your rebuilding will feel until you start. The rest of our lives are happening right now so I’m stepping off my soap box for the night because ya’ll know I’ll have more updates to come.
Snake-print jeans: Missguided | Long-sleeve crop top: Grass Stains Boutique (sold out, similar from Nordstrom & Urban Outfitters)| Cat-eye sunglasses: Quay | Snake-print black booties: Very Volatile (sold out, similar from Very Volatile)